This morning I got a call from a telemarketer, representing my local communications company...
Telemarketer: Could I please speak to Mr. or Mrs. Katrocket?
Telemarketer: (a little more confused now) Uh...could I please speak to Mrs. Katrocket?
Me: Yes. This is her. Can I help you?
Telemarketer: Ah! hello ma'am - how are you today? My name is [Telemarketer] and since you are a valued customer of Gigantic Communications Company Inc., I'm calling to offer you a special low rate when you sign up for our mobile phone service...
Me: I already subscribe to your mobile phone service.
Telemarketer: According to my records, you do not have a mobile phone account with us, ma'am.
Me: According to my records, I've been paying for this cellular account for over a year, and in fact I'm talking to you on my cell phone right now.
Telemarketer: There must be some mistake.
Me: Obviously it's on your end. Anything else?
Telemarketer: Can I interest you in our hi-speed internet service? We offer the fastest download speeds at the lowest prices, and...
Me: I already have an internet account with you.
Telemarketer: Really? According to my records...
Me: I think we just established that your records may not be entirely accurate.
Telemarketer: [pause] Oh... m'am? Oh, excuse me! I'm so very sorry, I was reading off another account on my screen here! [laughter] Silly me! ... um... are you Mr. Smith?
Me: Do I sound like Mr. Smith? I'm Ms. Katrocket...remember?
Telemarketer: Ah yes! Mrs. Katrocket... right?
Me: Yes, sir. Ms. Katrocket...
Telemarketer: yes - Ms. Katrocket...I'm calling you because you are a valued customer of Gigantic Communications Company Inc., and we would like to offer you a special low rate when you sign up for our mobile phone service...
Me: Are you serious?
Telemarketer: Yes! It's an exceptional savings package and tailored to meet your personal needs!
Me: But I just told you, I already have a mobile account with you.
Telemarketer: Perhaps you would be interested in our hi-speed internet services?