Wednesday, August 1, 2007

Interwebbers want Bert's ass

According to my site statistics, someone's been Googling "Bert's ass" recently, and much to their delight and joy, Google directed them straight to Rocketradio, where talk of Bert's ass is served up on a regular basis. This very post could reach the coveted #1 Google spot when the next curious Googler is looking for Bert's ass! I bet this keyword is ranked even higher on T-Words blog, since T can't really stop talking about Bert's ass. I mean, he's actually seen it in person, so I'd certainly shout it out to the world, if I was that lucky.

July keyword activity - the Rocketradio Top 10

Google says these are the interests that bring the People closer to me:

1. katrocket
2. vote Zod 08
3. sasha von bon bon the scandelles
4. kitty neptune pics
5. humping a pillow
6. bert's ass
7. womens sandals which gays will wear
8. ann margret in baked beans
9. boobie cupcakes
10. mojito drink recipe

As most of you will already know, this site contains no photos or vital statistics of Bert's ass, only repeated requests (by me) to Mr. Bananas for photos and vital statistics of his ass. Sometimes I feel ashamed about the constant begging, but I think Bert enjoys the attention. It's all about the dance, isn't it, mon petit chou?

I'd also like to mention that I sorta ripped the idea for this post from Grant Miller Media. Mr. Miller has a superfun blog so you should check it out, even though he's apparently far too cool and popular to bother reading yours. Screw you Grant Miller, but oh, how I love your blog.


Fauxbert said...

God, I love myself! Do you have any more pictures of me?

katrocket said...

Just this one. He has such an engaging smile.

pistols at dawn said...

Web searches could well be the most hilarious byproduct of blogs. There's always at least one (like Bert's ass) that makes you cringe for two reasons:

1) someone actually wanted to find this;
2) I can't remember ever writing anything related to this.

That's it, I'm stealing this for my own post. What else am I going to do, work? Ha ha ha ha ha.

Excuse me.

Ha ha ha....

katrocket said...

I can't wait to read your keywords, Pistols. As funny words and phrases go, you're top shelf.

Beth said...

Now I wanna see Bert's ass.

pistols at dawn said...

I want to note that I did get one you-related search as well - "Rocket Birthday M & Ms." I wasn't aware you had that kind of power, Kat - I thought only the President of the U.S. had specialized M&Ms.

Leonesse said...

How the hell do you find this info out? I guess I am just Nettarded. Somebody help me.

T said...

First things first. I have never seen his naked ass, -only his Dockered-ass. Meaning those pants that are worn on a golf course, (and when Bert goes to one of those midnight showings of Rocky Horror').

I have nothing else to add to Bert's ass that he already hasn't. -That lard-ass.

Bert Bananas said...

My wife says my ass is terrific. She says if you put my head on Michaelangelo's David, it would be totally me, except my penis is yellower.

I'm with Leonesse, I would like to know where/how you get these phrases. Or is this just another Pistol/Kat Production?

katrocket said...

Actually Bert - this is a real statistic and not something I'm making up, nor is Pistols. This is the real deal.

That being said, "Bert's ass" may be referring to any Bert, such as Bert and Ernie or Bert Reynolds. Someone in the Google universe searched for that and my blog came up on the search page, but it doesn't mean they are "actually" in search of YOUR specific ass. I just found this info so shocking and funny that I had to share. I hope I did not offend you, my friend.

here's how: I subscribe to Statcounter and Google Anayltics traffic programs, and that's how I receive reports on keyword activity.

Bert Bananas said...

Thank you, Katline Dion.

You are above reproach and where I am concerned need never fear that you could ever possibly offend me as long as I remember to keep my clothes on.

As for "Statcounter and Google Anayltics traffic programs" these smack of messing around with the Devil and I hope you never combine them with alcohol or marriage.

Jana said...

Hey Kat, will you go over to this blog and discuss Canadian health care please? You're the only Canadian I know --- and we're such good friends and all, I didn't think you'd mind too much? =-)
Thank you!!!

The Guv'ner said...


I think I ruptured something.

pistols at dawn said...

"Google Anayltics?" I haven't seen a woman that scared of "Anal" since...oh, God, it's just too easy.

katrocket said...

HEY! Just because I can't spell doesn't mean I don't answer the back door.

pistols at dawn said...

I hope this thread of comments gives you a whole new line of Google searches.

And by the way, laughed aloud at that comeback.