Though he's done a fine job of self-promotion, and has even offered suggestions on how you can make this the best The Idea of Progress Day ever, I regret that I cannot truly celebrate a holiday that does not allow me time off work. Unlike so many of you, I do need to drink to have a good time, or at the very least, I need to not be at work to have a good time, and my new employer has some serious hangups about such behaviour.
But I will do my best to pretend it's not actually just another fucking Monday in winter, because The Idea of Pissing Off The Idea of Progress has too many consequences. He looks like he could blow me up real good.So I will celebrate the self-proclaimed holiday of this raging megalomaniac by:
1) getting up early to write a lame post about The Idea of Progress Day.
2) parting my hair on the opposite side
3) going commando
4) going to work and doing work
5) having a cocktail or two after going to work and doing work
Have a safe and happy celebration!
6 comments:
These are fine ways for you to celebrate today. I particularly endorse steps 2,3 and 5.
in that picture, is he going off to enforce his holiday on poor defenseless nations? "celebrate damn you. CELEBRATE!"
Actually, that photo was taken ages ago. Progress was my Marksman 101 coach at The Destructors of Tomorrow Summer Camp.
I am not down with #4 at all. Besides, without gin flakes for breakfast, you'll be shaking on the job. Wait, that's me.
God bless!
I am so against #4. There should be no work accomplished on Idea of Progress day. Isn't that the epitome of the Idea of Progress?
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