A preacher was giving his sermon one day about 'forgiveness'.
At the end of the sermon, he asked the parish or crowd or mosh pit or whatever the hell they call the people in the church audience, "Who here can say they don't need to practice forgiveness?"
Old lady Smith at 84 years young was the only person who raised her hand. The preacher came down to her and asked, "Mrs. Smith, how come you don't have to practice any forgiveness?"
Mrs. Smith replied, "Father, I have no forgiveness to give anyone because I have no enemies!"
The preacher was astonished. "Mrs. Smith can you come in front of the mosh pit (or parish or whatever) and tell everyone what you've done to have no enemies please? This is truly wonderful!"
Little old Mrs. Smith nods her head, slowly walks up to the pulpit, leans into the microphone and says quietly, "I outlived the cunts."
falwless & beckeye: I don't get it. Did you not read the part where "I lied about the wheels"? Not even a mention of any handicap. I think YOU TWO are the one who are handicapped (mentally, of course)
Warren: You know I love you baby, but I will not tolerate your slanderous attitude towards Mr. Miller. Besides, your facts are incorrect: he's actually a Grade AAA douche bag.
13 comments:
You know what though? The picture was even funnier!
Idiot!!:)
I vote for number 1. (What did the fsh say when he ran into the wall? "Dam.")
Grant Miller still has a blog? Huh.
When I was a kid, my dad told me the one that goes:
Q: What's black & white & red all over?
A: A wounded nun.
Always liked that one.
That stick one is a classic. I love that joke.
A preacher was giving his sermon one day about 'forgiveness'.
At the end of the sermon, he asked the parish or crowd or mosh pit or whatever the hell they call the people in the church audience, "Who here can say they don't need to practice forgiveness?"
Old lady Smith at 84 years young was the only person who raised her hand. The preacher came down to her and asked, "Mrs. Smith, how come you don't have to practice any forgiveness?"
Mrs. Smith replied, "Father, I have no forgiveness to give anyone because I have no enemies!"
The preacher was astonished. "Mrs. Smith can you come in front of the mosh pit (or parish or whatever) and tell everyone what you've done to have no enemies please? This is truly wonderful!"
Little old Mrs. Smith nods her head, slowly walks up to the pulpit, leans into the microphone and says quietly, "I outlived the cunts."
Making fun of wheelchair-bound zebras is not funny, miss.
that's troo-- Grant would never post shit like this. He'd just raise that one eyebrow like he always does and probably sigh and walk away...
cant believe I never heard the Stick One!
Yeah, I'm with Beckeye -- what is this, National Make Fun of Handicapped Zebras day? Nice going, Hitler. Not funny at all.
thanks everyone for sharing your jokes.
falwless & beckeye: I don't get it. Did you not read the part where "I lied about the wheels"? Not even a mention of any handicap. I think YOU TWO are the one who are handicapped (mentally, of course)
No jokes about golf? Truly tasteless.
That Grant Miller is a Grade A douche bag.
Pistols: Golf is no laughing matter.
Warren: You know I love you baby, but I will not tolerate your slanderous attitude towards Mr. Miller. Besides, your facts are incorrect: he's actually a Grade AAA douche bag.
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