Friday, July 13, 2007


I'm reading a lot of stories in the news about how we're all spending beyond our means, and carrying more personal debt (credit cards, loans, mortgages, etc) than ever before, and passing these bad habits on to the next generation.

I'm a simple girl with poor to middling mathematical skills, but I have an economic proposal for the Canadian government - yes finally, a way to help its hard-working citizens invest in their future by changing the way we think about saving money. If there was as much pleasure derived from saving money as there was in spending it, the world might be a better place.

Of course, I cannot divulge my full proposal on this blog for reasons of national security, but here's the selling point:

Katrockenonomic Proposal 12 -- print money that men will be reluctant to spend:

Still to come: how to entice straight women and gay men to save their money - male beefcake photos have failed all market testing to date. It seems there is no naturally occuring force on Earth that will stop them from buying "those cute shoes that were on sale". Rocketradio is open to your suggestions.


pistols at dawn said...

Stop selling shoes, or only allow cut-rate discounters like Payless to make shoes.

Or, bring back clogs or giant buckles.

Or, cut off the feet of all women. What are they walking for anyway? The kitchen's not THAT big.

Also, thanks again for making my employer think I spend all day looking at oddly artistic porn.

katrocket said...

You should know by now that Rocketradio is Rarely Safe For Work. Where's my thank-you for fooling your employer into thinking you actually do something all day?

It's not my problem that you are gainfully employed. That's all on you.

And thank you for your ongoing misogyny. Please come again.

pistols at dawn said...

I didn't hate women until I dated my way through women's studies departments. Then, I fully appreciated just how whiny y'all are.

I kid. I try to surround myself with women because they're more intelligent, insightful, and have better boobs than men.

The men I know, anyway.

And I could never actually hate women, because I try to be as far away from Bukowski as possible, and I'm already a drunk and a terrible writer.

T said...

(Now that I'm back out of the restroom) I would first like to thank you for being so insightful and creative. -Brought a tear to my eye (and a lump in my... throat).

If you want me to move to (or even vacation in) Canada, you've provided an excellent inspiration. However, if you never want me around, go ahead and compensate with them 'beefcakes'.

Thanks for my morning "uplifting".

Leonesse said...

Oh, please, you wouldn't have many bills left in circulation. The treasury would go broke printing up the stuff.

But I have to say that is a smashing idea. It would even make my teens get JOBS aaaaannnd have the benefit of me always knowing where they were after payday. Locked in the bathroom.

Bert, the Bosom Buddy Banana said...

I was reminded of an introduction Johnny Carson once gave: "Here they are, Dolly Parton!"

Bert, the Boinging Banana said...

Also boinging to mind is the phrase, "sticky money."

Dale said...

This makes so much more 'cents' than my idea of putting Helen Mirren on our money.

Snooze said...

Oooh. Those are quite lovely. Each one of them.

Bert Bananas said...

Snooze, all six?

The Guv'ner said...

Add a Ferrari and a bottle of Labatt's and you'd make 'em cry.

For the ladies it's easy. You make chocolate money. Problem solved.

J Morgetron said...

Purely genius!